When do I stop fighting for her?
We are both fierce and gentle
While sitting in church today, I thought of the lengths I would go to in order to protect my family. I would run through the fires of hell for my daughter. There is no scheme of the enemy I would turn away from in order to protect her. Most mothers would nod in agreement when we discuss the fierceness of a mama when it comes to her babies. It is how we are hardwired, we will forsake ourselves to ensure another’s survival. In fact, I love that intensity God placed within woman. We will rage into battle, then turn and gather loved ones into our arms for a long embrace. Women, we are both fierce and gentle.
When is it time for us to step aside?
As I was pondering the fierce love mother’s possess, I looked over at my child. I wish I could tell you the song being sung because it made the moment more powerful, but I cannot. What I can share with you is in that moment, the Spirit softly whispered, “Step aside. She needs to learn to start fighting on her own. Your own armor can prevent her from putting on her own.” Oh man. Yet, I know it is true. With each passing year, I must step aside more and more. In order for my daughter to put on the armor of God, I have to stop shielding her from all that comes her way. This does not mean I will leave her side, however. There will be a day she must choose whether or not to follow where God leads, and each day prior can prepare her. But if she never learns to trust God for herself, if she doesn’t learn His kindness and His mercy for herself, I have fought battles not meant for me to fight. As soon as I heard the Spirit speak, I inhaled, my heart skipped a beat. The Spirit then said, “He will fight for her as he has fought for you. She also walks in the victory of the Lord.” Yes and amen.
Let’s prepare our children
In the Old Testament, we read of David and Goliath. You probably know the story, small boy David takes down big giant Goliath with nothing but a sling and five stones. Prior to David facing off with Goliath, Saul offers his own armor to David. As quickly as David has stepped into the armor, he steps out of the armor. Saul is older, and bigger, and his armor gets in the way more than it helps when on David. This is the image I saw this morning, my child trying to put on my armor. As much as I would want her to be safe and protected, my armor would be poorly suited for her. No, she needs her own, specifically designed and fitted for her. Our strengths differ, our weaknesses differ. God, in the beauty of his design, knows exactly what type, size, and specifications our armor needs to be. He knows, more than we parents ever will, exactly what battles our children will face. And sometimes, the best we can do is step aside and allow Him to lead our children as we walk beside them. Let us become obedient in allowing God to be who he says he is in our children’s lives. We are to be active participants, but we should not do so much we prevent our children from being active participants as well.
Scripture
11 Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes. 12 For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. 13 Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. (Ephesians 6:11-13)
Prayer
God, help us to prepare our children well. Give us wisdom to know when it is time for us to step aside, and to know the difference between fighting alongside of them rather than instead of them.
Going further
In what ways are you helping your children, or young people you influence, to put on the full armor of God? How are you equipping them for whatever life may hold? In what ways can you walk alongside of them? Ultimately, it is God who fights for us. He will fight for our children far better than we ever could. Remember, He has made us all victorious through Jesus.
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